What is a breadwinner?
Coming from a wealthy country in Europe, the expression breadwinner was unfamiliar to me before moving to Asia
In most countries in Asia and also other parts of the world. It's not as common with good pension plans for everyone and that the government will fully take care of the elderly. It's common that the kids take care of their parents, as they get old and this is big part of the culture
It's often the oldest child that becomes the breadwinner, but the parents can also help appoint one of the kids the role. Then the child appointed to be breadwinner, is expected to go find work and send money back to the family. If you're lucky, there's work close to your home, but often the bread winner will travel far. Maybe even to another country
If the breadwinner gets kids, these will often be sent to live with the child's grandparents. While the bread winner will be away working and often rarely see their family
Sending money home
I remember growind up, hearing how many of the foreigners married to Norwegians. That kept sending money and other items (clothes, chocolates, etc), back to their families at homeThis was always strange to me, not that you give gifts to your family once in a while. But that the child constantly giving financial support to their parents and siblings
In my culture, kids grow up to be financially independent. The parents is the ones to give financial support, until the kids manage to be independent
So I fully understand how being a breadwinner and sending financial support to your family, can be a huge culture shock for the ones not familiar with the practice
If you go back a few generations in Norway, before it became a rich country. It was more common the kids took care of their elderly and you'd often have multiple generations under the same roof
As the country grew richer, people were no longer depending on their kids to support them. As one grew older, one would have pentions and other arrangements, such as retirement homes. So the elderly could continue to live, without having to depend on their kids for everything
Breadwinner VS Independent
What is best, will be a very individual opinionWhat I can say for sure, neither is perfect. Being a breadwinner is often stressful and lonely role, as you often will be far from your family
On the other hand, being independent can often mean you don't really see your family much. Where it often becomes just holidays and other events. You live your own very seperat lifes
Living in Asia for many years, have reminded me of the importance of family. That I often feel is overlooked, in many western cultures today